Move out what no longer works, and make room for what does
So much of our lives is spent living in the past. Reviewing what went wrong, beating ourselves up for past “mistakes” that we cannot change. And then there is the future…wishing we had what we “think” someone else has that makes them happy, thinking if I only get this THIS! Then my life will be great, if I only have THIS then my life will be great. What would happen if you started being happy NOW?!
Can you think of what is working in your life right now? For me it’s having the time to write this blog, being able to teach yoga to amazing people every day, having a beautiful safe space to live, and being able to live in this great city that I fell in love with back in college, to name a few.
What isn’t working for me? Reliving the past, and wishing I could change things I can't. Thinking unkind thoughts to myself when I’m not feeling 100% positive. Comparing myself to others. Staying up past midnight when I have to be up before 7. Leaving the pile of dishes in my sink when I KNOW I will feel better if I just got up and cleaned them. Putting myself down for choosing relaxation over washing said dishes…you get my point!
I believe the first step in moving out the things or habits in our lives that no longer serve us is to recognize them. Write them down. Take some time to really think about what isn’t working in your life. It could be a habit, a job, a way of thinking, a person in your life, it can be something big or something small or maybe something in between. Once we can recognize what is not working in our lives, we can take this awareness with us and try and remove them from our lives. Not so easy I know- some of these “things” have been in our lives a very long time. It could take years to move them out. The good news is there is no rush and you are starting right now by reading this blog and taking a moment to think about your life.
Once we realize what is not working, in our lives, we get to start having some fun by thinking about what does work! Write it all down- compliment yourself, list your personal accomplishments however minor or major they may seem. You took the time to read something to help YOU! Maybe you went to a yoga class or for a walk instead of staying home on the couch all day, maybe you found a hobby that you love, maybe you tried something new today, or took yourself out of a relationship that no longer serves you. Sure it can be you got a promotion at work, or you quit a job that you hate, or finally told that special someone you love them.
It can be anything that makes YOU feel good about YOU!!! This is your life and you deserve to be happy. Do not think of this as selfish because the more we put ourselves first and show ourselves kindness and compassion, the more we can be there for others. I’m sure your friends, co-workers, family members, the people you get your coffee or tea from, or those sitting or standing next to you on the subway will be in a much better position being around a more happy YOU!
So go crazy… write out what doesn’t work, write down what does work, and once you start focusing on what you DO have, the less time you will waste focusing on what you think you do not.
The more you learn how to let go of what does not serve you, the more space you are clearing for what does and the more open you are to receive everything that you deserve. Some things you may not even realize you want will appear. You don’t always need to know, but you do need to trust in yourself.
The next time you beat yourself up for something you did in the past or don’t currently have, recognize it as stopping you from living your best life. You can start taking the steps to walk away and use this new awareness to begin to walk toward the happy and truthful life you deserve. I know it’s not easy but it is so worth it.
No matter what is going on in your life good, bad or neutral, trust that you are exactly where you are supposed to be, learning what you are supposed to be learning, experiencing what you are supposed to be experiencing, and hopefully learning to love yourself as much as you can along the way. You are worth it and you are definitely enough.